Whose dog is the most intelligent

Four friends were arguing over whose dog was the smartest. The first man, an engineer, called to his dog, “T Square, show your stuff. ” The dog trotted over to a desk, pulled out a paper and pencil, and drew a perfect triangle.

The next guy, an accountant, called to his dog, “Slide Rule, go ahead. ” The dog went to the kitchen, nibbled opened a bag of cookies and pided the contents into four equal piles.

The next man, a chemist, beckoned his dog, Beaker, to show what he could do. The dog went to the fridge, took out a quart of milk and poured out exactly eighty ounces into a measuring cup.

The last man was a government worker. “Coffee Break,” he hollered to his dog, “go to it. ” With that, the dog jumped to his feet, soiled the paper, ate the cookies and drank the milk.

翻譯:誰的狗最聰明

四個朋友在為誰的狗最聰明而爭吵。第一個人是個工程師，他對自己的狗喊道：“T形角，使出你的本領來。”這只狗便跑向一個書桌，拉出一張紙和一支鉛筆，畫出了一個完美的三角形。

第二個人是個會計。他對他的狗說：“Slide Rule，上吧。”那狗直奔廚房，用嘴咬開一袋甜餅并把餅分成了四等份。

第三個人是位藥劑師。他命令他的狗Beaker表現一下。但見那狗徑直走向冰箱，叼出一瓶牛奶并精確地把八盎司牛奶倒入一個量杯中。

最后一位是政府職員。“休息時間，”他對自己的狗喊叫，“去吧。”話還未落，那狗便跳起來，踏污了那張紙，吃掉了所有的甜餅，喝光了那杯牛奶。

2. I hung him up to dry  

Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.

When the medical director became aware of Mary‘s heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office.

“Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you‘re being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you‘ve regained your senses. The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom，he‘s dead.”

Mary replied, “He didn‘t hang himself, I hung him up to dry.”

翻譯:是我把他晾干了

Jim和Mary都是精神病院里的病人。一天，他們沿著醫院的游泳池散步，Jim突然跳入泳池的深水區，他沉到了底部。Mary立刻跳下去救他，她潛到水底，把Jim拉了上來。

當院長聽聞了Mary的英勇行為后，他立刻翻看了她的病歷檔案,把她叫進了自己的辦公室.

“Mary，我有一個好消息和一個壞消息要告訴你。好消息是你能跳入水中救其他病人，這說明你的意識已經恢復了，你可以出院了。壞消息就是，Jim，你救的那個病人，他還是用自己的浴袍帶子在浴室上吊自殺了。”

Mary說：“他沒有自殺，是我把他吊起來好讓他晾干。”